He Knows Me Well

 

Thanks best friend in the whole universe! :squirtyay: It's very purdy! Everyone at work was supa jelly!

What We Have Is Enduring

The wind is blowing the snow off the roof
And it looks like fairy dust
Sparkling and magical

And it's like we are walking
Side-by-side
Huddled in our coats and scarves

Talking of the days past
The smoke billowing from our mouths
Materializing into paintings

And we talked of
Secrets and things that we felt
That we never would've talked about

With anyone else,
At any other time,
Anywhere else...

The world can be such a cold place
But it feels so warm in my heart
Having known you.

Possessed

I've been trying so hard
But they've been there for so long,
I've been lying on the door
They've been wanting to burst through

...and I finally let them.

They erupt, being repressed for so long
A fast bullet of black ink,
Smoke in my cup of water
And I am changed.

"One Day You Will Teach Me to Let Go of My Fears"

I've been trying so hard
But the shadows won't leave me
They make me guarded,
But I think I've been guarding them too.

They've been there for so long
Burnt into the ground I tread
...and I can't be without them
I am nothing without them.


I'm dizzy when I close my eyes
The darkness is a drug and a fright
It's a such a war, such a struggle
In my mind

And I'm laughing and I'm crying
So afraid, so I'm fighting it
And I'm hiding in it
I'm holding onto it.

I WANT TO BE CUTE TOO!

I don't know what inspired this. I only wanted to draw a cute kitten (for someone), but then I thought, that's not enough! I can't let no cute cat over-cute my koala! Well. I guess that's it. Hahaha! But then of course, what happens? Koala ends up looking stoopid. As per usual. :P Ha! (And no, koala didn't kill the cat, it's only a costume... *shifty eyes*)

Mew... mewmewmemwmemwmewmemwew!

I feel like I make this face a lot in real life... lol.

Metamorphosis

My tulle skirt! This wasn't in my original plan (my original plan was to only make wings), but then I saw Jenny Matrix's dress (from VGHS) when she sang opera and it was so purdy and I was like, "I WANT ONE!" I had the hardest time finding tulle. Luckily there was a Michael's near my work and I went to go get some during lunch last Monday. I got a spool of black glitter tulle, and a spool of gold glitter tulle (both 6 yards), and another spool of ivory white tulle (this one is 100 yards). They didn't have any plain black ones, so I thought maybe I'll use the ivory white one as a filler and use the gold and black ones on top. So. For those that are thinking of buying tulle... NEVER, EVER PURCHASE GLITTER ONES BECAUSE THEY WILL BE -EVERYWHERE-. And by everywhere, I mean EVERYWHERE. Like rolling naked in sand. They end up in cracks you never thought imaginable. I kid you not. Anyway. I wanted my skirt to be quite long because I was going to wear a black dress underneath and I wanted it to cover, if not, be longer, than my dress. I used 106 yards in total and each strip of tulle being 2 feet long (well, double that because this is a no-sew skirt -- I can't sew for sh*t). And voila! Also got a crimson ribbon for the base. Oh, the reason why I didn't use the black glitter tulle was because the texture was way too different to mesh in seamlessly with the rest of the skirt (it was stiffer in texture). I'm very happy with the way it turned out. At first I thought I wouldn't have enough tulle because I still had ribbon left over when I used up all my ivory white one and my gold glitter one... but because I had bunched them up really tightly (for the super poof!), I figured I can make up for the empty space by spacing them out more, and it worked and it was still poofy as heck!

My butterfly wings! I've always had great affinity for butterflies. I'm not sure if I ever related this story on my blog... When I was young, on this summer's day, I was out enjoying the greens and the sunshine and the warmth. A white butterfly fluttered by and I followed it to a flower. I examined it closely. And as anyone afflicted with want and curiosity, I reached forth slowly, wanting to touch its delicate wings... just to feel it. It did not fly away. And I touched its ever-so-soft wings, dusty with pollen... Allured and possessed, I did not notice that the butterfly had started flapping its wings... and I tore a part of its wing off... It spluttered off, injured. The sense of wonderment was instantly replaced with immense guilt, knowing that I killed it... My fingertips, still powdered, as I watch it disappear into the world to death, and forever resting in my mind. ...I looked for butterfly costumes everywhere online, but none catered to adults (well, there were, but they were all... distasteful). Then I thought, "Why in the world am I not making my own wings?!" And thus, I researched for DIY projects on how to make wings... I couldn't decide on what colour to make my wings, but I settled on this red because it was the only pair of stockings I could find that were lacy. I was going to make the entirety of my wings one colour, but the stocking would not cooperate with the 16 gauge wire that I used. It was pretty tough to manipulate the nylon -- that was the most difficult part of it all. For the top part of the wings, I used two coat hangers as the frame. The black nylon was considerably thinner, so I used the 16 gauge wire for it (though it was still much too weak to withhold its shape against the nylon). I used duck tape to bring it all together (I've never really used duck tape before and they really -are- quite efficient and effective!). I then used lacy black ribbon for the straps. I don't know if it's my back though, or my poor estimate of how long I should make the straps (even though I've tested it), but my wings were rather crooked. I didn't mind too much though. Nothing wrong with crooked wings. It represents me rather well.

This is my outfit put together. I wore a black dress, with a black, long cardigan over it and black tights (don't get too jelly of my Totoro slippers!)... I also wore my Victorian-esque high heels. I didn't think my cardigan would've worked, but it did. And I could spread my tulle skirt a bit to access my pockets. It's like, a secret compartment! *shifty eyes* So. Funny thing. I had to work on Halloween. Yes. And so it turns out I was THE ONLY ONE that dressed up at work. Yep. It was pretty hawkward, but I guess no one enjoys Halloween more than I do at (it is arguably, my favourite holiday). So um. It was a rainy day. And when I got into work, I took the stairs, carrying a bunch of stuff with me (I also didn't wear my glasses (I don't wear contacts) because if I can't see people judging me, then I won't be so self-conscious)... and I was thinking to myself, "Oh god, I wish I don't slip and crack my head open..." And guess what happened? ...There are two flights of stairs down to the floor my office is on... And at the end of the first flight, I fell. Yes. I fell. Luckily, I didn't fall at the top, but it was still pretty painful. I got up pretty quickly though, and as anyone who gets hurt or falls, I looked around to see if anyone saw... One of my colleague came right after I got up... I later asked him if he saw me fall, but he said he didn't, phew. But my leg was pretty swollen, lol. Oops! One thing that surprised me was that almost everyone at work said that I looked very pretty when they saw me. I got paid so many nice compliments, I was getting super embarrassed. *shifty eyes* They were all pretty surprised that I came to work like that. I guess I am the only one that grew up in Western culture? (I work at an Asian company...) *shakes head* Haha. And people wanted to take pictures of me... I can't even..... I had... 3 photos taken of me by other people, which was extremely awkward. I should've asked for a fee, lol. I rejected all the other attempts though, lol. Oh, and remember when I said don't ever get glitter tulle? Yeah. If you were looking for me at work, all you had to do was follow the glitter. Holy shizzles. There was glitter everywhere, lol. I almost felt bad. My male colleague (the one that came in after I did, in the stairway) refused to sit in the seat I sat in, because he was worried about getting glitter on his pants. -_- Haha.

What's a camwhoring session without making faces?

I wanted to incorporate gold into mah makeup, so I can tie in all the colours: black, red, white, gold. I couldn't decide what lip to go with though. I ended up using my dark red lip lacquer... but I had already taken that off before this picture because I had to eat dinner, so I just put on mah trusty red lipstick instead. So, in actuality, I had darker lips than this throughout the day.

I really did enjoy this year's Halloween! Even though I only got one piece of chocolate from a co-worker. No one else gave me candy. *pouts* But yeah, I feel like it was a successful project! Everything turned out well. Oh, right, I have to explain what my costume actually is. The tulle skirt represents the "cocoon" and the top half of me is the butterfly emerging out of it... *smiles* Hence the title of this post. For my love of the butterfly, and for the change, and for the transformation into something good and carefree. Something I strive to be.

People said I looked really different. Maybe I should put more effort into my everyday look? Lol. Or was it the lack of glasses?! I don't even know. Hahaha.

And thus concludes my account of my Halloween, 2014! Best to end it with a cheeky photo. Oh, and also! My ring! It is the most beautiful thing that ever resided on my finger -- it is replication of Denna's ring (the author worked with the jeweler to create it). Denna is the female protagonist in my most adored book series of all time: The Kingkiller Chronicles.

Hope everyone had a fun and safe Halloween! 

Insanity, Before or After?

I've had this image in my head for a while also. ...I've been feeling so oppressed lately, due to my circumstances, which I shall not divulge here because this is my world and it shan't be tainted by the mentioning of such things. Anyway, I wanted to express the idea that I am being held "hostage" by my duties (the fancy birdcage), and I am trying to make the best of my circumstances. I am going insane, so I can remain sane. But what if I was already insane?...

Lone Wanderer

I've had this image in my head for so long. Standing at the edge of a precipice. There is only moonlight and the wind. 

It was hard to draw. ;_; But I had such an urge to. I think I still fucked up the stance and the body and whatnot. It's okay though. Because I like her hair. I have such an affinity for billowing things. *shifty eyes*

I drew this one on the spot today because I was craving it. I don't quite understand my recent desire to draw human. I've always had problems drawing facial profiles (they normally turn out looking like cavemen), but this one was okay. I guess. *runs away*

Higher Than a Kite, In My Mind

I've been wanting to draw this for the longest time. A Koala. Riding a platypus. No idea where it came from, just an image in my head. No, I wasn't on drugs when I thought of it or when I drew it. It just seemed funny to me. In my head. Yes. 

I have an unhealthy love for sketch lines. I much prefer them to a polished work. I think it looks more complete with the multiple attempts to draw the perfect line... I DON'T HAVE ANYTHING TO HIDE! *shifty eyes*
I had a hard time deciding what to do with the bare background. At first I was going to do a space scene, but I had already done that with the doodle that I dedicated to tjoe. Then I thought maybe underwater, but that would take much too long (I wanted it to be done with it in one day). Then I thought, "Fuck it. Since it's so psychedelic in some ways, why not feed to that thought?" So I drew everything I liked in the background, like me and my platypus pal were cruising through adventures. Wheeee!

(Insert random gibberish here)

The crafting tradition for my birthday. STARS!

An oldie, but just thought I would post my coloured Akali.

L'enfant de la lune

And it is the only light
In the dark, dark sky

Always remaining,
Always changing.

I see it in my eyes
Its reflection

A familiar sight
A different time.

I am changed
I am the same,

Another phase
An oscillation of tides;

Intrepid moments
Internalizations

Agonizing thoughts
Ardent fervor

It is an introspection
It is still the same story;

I am all of the darkness
And the only light.

Libre

She came before my butterflies one. I didn't get to finish drawing her until now. There is a certain freedom that comes with not being afraid of getting wet from the rain. There is no rain in this doodle, but a certain freedom.

Prayer for the Sole Lost Shoe On the Road

I am just the passerby
In the passenger seat
Of a passing car

It's a red light
We slow to a stop
Next to the sole lost

Shoe, unmoving
Trampled, Silent
And in silence, I look at it.

I've always wondered
How it ended up there
In that state

If it ever knows
That it is lost
And alone

If it ever wonders
How it ended up there
In that state

When will the possessor
Of the sole lost shoe
Realize it is gone?

No longer running,
Left behind,
Forgotten.

The light is green,
And we are moving,
Only my reflection left in the window

And I say silently,
A prayer for the sole
Lost shoe on the road

A prayer for the sole
Lost shoe on the road,
That it finds its way.

This is my "fuck you" to my brain

I have, for so long, convinced myself that I can't draw anything human-like and should stop attempting to do so, so I never did. That's why I have been drawing my friends as animals. Because I find it a lot easier. Anyway, I don't know what propelled me to this project, but I really wanted to my League friends as chibis! So I did! I was rather amazed at the rate at which I spat them out. I drew like 3 chibis at day at one point... And they don't look too shabby! (Though admittedly, there is a lot of erase marked and residual pencil marks and some of the body parts are kind of messed up, but hey.) I had quite a lot of fun with it (excepting putting them all together in one photo...). I also tried to make each of them look like the person they're supposed to be. Which turned me into a part-time Facebook stalker, but that's what you gotta do! :P Anywho, we are all our favourite champions and our favourite skin of that champion. :)

I chose Crimson Akali. I've always loved Akali, but I never play her in normal games. Crimson Akali is a legacy (I think) skin and I totally got it on sale and it's red and purdy and I love it. I even added a tiny koala on the hair piece. :D

Rogue chose Spell Thief Lux. But because Lux is a female champion, I had to change his outfit a bit to match his rugged and manliness... *snickers* :P

Rex chose Scorch Earth Renekton. This was actually, the second chibi I drew (after myself, because I wanted to experiment with my chibi first). So cute and determined.

Kasey is Buccaneer Tristana! I think this is probably my favourite chibi out of them all. I don't know, I guess I just really like how it turned out. And I made the pirate's hat smaller. Aww...

Beau chose High Noon Twisted Fate. I quite like how this one turned out too. I like the stance and the card. :D

Cori's chibi is Steel Legion Lux. I was afraid of messing this one up because this Lux skin is rather intricate. But it turned out alright! Woohoo!

Dizzeh chose Infernal Nasus. I thought this one was going to be hard too! What with all the dog heads I had to draw. I rather like the staff. That turned out well.

Squid Lips chose Jinx. The only one who chose the classic skin! Well to be fair, Jinx only has one skin... lol I thought this one was going to be hard too! So many guns to draw! AAAHHHHH!!!

I didn't get to ask Dan what he wanted *shifty eyes*, but he mains Renekton and loves this skin, so I figured THIS MUST BE THE ONE. lol This was by far the easiest skin, lol. Yay! BUT, BUT!!! Dan has like, no friggin' pictures, so I can't really tell what he looks like, so... this is the best I could do.

And finally, Dougie chose Astronaut Teemo! Aww...

So now, the question is... should I colour it? lol o_o

de Papillons

I wonder what it's like to dissipate into butterflies.

This one took me a while. I knew what I wanted, but I didn't know how to execute it. 

The head was rather easy, but how I want to represent being "of butterflies" was rather difficult. 

I know that I didn't want to draw butterflies in place of the entire body.

Originally, I wanted everything to look like they were floating in the air. Everything lifted. But it didn't look... right. 

After I started drawing the butterflies, I wonder what I should do with the areas of the body that weren't going to be covered with butterflies. This is what took me so long. I don't know how many times I erased the left side of the body, because none of it looked fitting enough. I did research, watched the beautiful lifecycle of butterflies..., drew patterns that looked liked wings that haven't emerged yet... and so on.

In the end, I just decided to colour it in.

So it perhaps, helps with the smoky effect when a butterfly decides to fly away, leaving that piece blank. 

As you know, I am no expert at drawing human bodies. 

I think I did okay here. I think the leg proportions may be a bit off. Oh well. 

I did rather enjoy drawing the butterflies. Because of my great affinity for them. 

Every butterfly is a piece of the puzzle. And marks the passage of time. 

I don't know what the tone of this doodle is. Is it sad? I'm not sure. Is it happy? Not particularly. 

Does it represent life or death?

Even I'm not entirely sure...

The woman's eyes are closed... but her arms are slightly spread, her palms are open... as if giving into it all, willingly.

Aww, So cute!

Basic drawing.

Coloured.

Need I say more?

So. It's been a while. Yay for simple digital artworks! Even though that damned hedgehog took forever! 

He's fat too. That's why he needs to be walked. Heh heh heh...

Masquerade, Broken

I just suddenly had this urge to draw a masquerade mask. They're so pretty. But I struggled in how I want to draw it and what details I want it to have. That took a very long time. I made it easier for myself though because it's asymmetrical, haha! And then, it came to me -- I wanted it to be broken, right down the middle. To make the asymmetry more meaningful also. Thus, began the planning. I wanted the right half to be dark (the thorny vines and the decorative blood-drips at the far side). Lifeless. Twisted. Foreboding. Even menacing. ...But that becomes more life-like, holds promise, as it gets closer to the centre. The right side, is the opposite, representing life, light, growth (the butterfly wings, the bird, the leaves/petals around the eye, and curls at the end representing sun's light *shifty eyes* lol). And as it approaches the middle, the butterfly is without its body. 

 Where it is broken, there is a rose petal and a feather, from the two things that are closest to the centre (well the bird is flying towards the centre)... as if they materialized from the brokenness. Became real from the brokenness. And although the mask is broken, they are still tied together. I'm not sure what I want that to symbolize. I guess I still want to show that they are connected, despite being different, despite being disconnected, simultaneously.

The tendrils rising from the right side aren't just pencil marks. I'm not entirely sure why I felt compelled to add those in, as if the masquerade is a curse and it being broken, released something. 

I don't know. I drew this rather unconsciously, investing in it, meaning that is not entirely understood by even myself, the artist, hahaha. 

Perhaps I just want to show that there is more beyond life and death, two interconnected, yet very different things.

It Ends Today, It Starts Today

I started this doodle the other night when I drew that girl. I drew this because I was feeling angry and sad and lonely. I'm not sure about you, dear reader, but I hate the feeling of being left out. It leaves you feeling worthless and unloved. Though I'm sure that's not the case, you can't help but feel that way... And you would only feel such a way because you crave to laugh and share those moments with people that you care about... only to feel that they will have those moments anyway, with or without you. And that's a sad thought. ...My art is my catharsis and the more that I draw those dark lines on the paper, the less dark I feel inside. And suddenly it hit me. Even if my friends are having fun without me, why don't they deserve to have fun? Of course they do. And there will always be times when I am not able in join in on the fun... Although it makes me sad, I shouldn't be feeling so sad. So voila. This is the result of such a realization. I'm okay with not being included. I can have my own fun. *wink*  ...I'll always be along side of them anyway. :)

Sweet Madness

I've been working on this one for a bit. I drew it for a friend in mind. I hope it expresses how much his friendship means to me. I don't think what I drew is immediately obvious, but I mean for it to capture presence/absence. Maybe you can take a guess what that is. I've tried to draw it as true to the sample image I found. Well anyhow, this is for you, A.S.!

I got into a mood last night where I felt nothing else but drawing maniacally can relief. I never thought I'd venture into drawing faces, but I felt inclined to last night somehow. I think I did okay. It definitely needs work, but that's the facial expression I wanted. And the movement of the hair also.

Memories - On Teachers

So today, while I was taking a break from the art that I was working on, I was browsing on Facebook when I came across a post by one of my high school classmates. He was commenting on how he was checking out the Rate My Teachers site, which also prompted me to take a look at it too.

I go down the list reading the ratings and comments other students had left of the teachers that I had in high school. I've been on this site before, I must add. Years ago. Anyway, it inspired me to write a post on the most influential teachers I've ever had in my (academic) life.

Let's rewind all the way back to when I was still in Taiwan. When I was in grade one, I had a teacher who shared the same last name as me. Although my memory of what she looked like was faint, I'm sure I still have photos of her here somewhere. She has short, boy-cut hair, with round glasses. The most memorable thing about her was her ability to tell stories. I remember those afternoons where all of us sat at our desks in columns and rows, listening to her fantastical story of a flying car, sending us all into a dream-like trance. I also remember the extra-curricular art classes that she hosted after school. One particular session stood out in my mind where we drew on styrofoam sheets (making imprints and poking holes on it), then painting it, and pressing it onto paper like a stamp. I no longer have the artwork, but I remember doing an underwater themed painting. This teacher and I, though I moved to another school closer to my house in the second grade, kept a correspondence for a bit after I moved to Canada. Since my education in writing Chinese ended when I was in grade two, I wrote to her in (still poor) English, with my parents promising me that she would understand. It's a good feeling to receive her letters. It's probably one of the reasons why I enjoy writing long letters to people, hoping that they bring the same joy that I feel when I receive them.

When I first came to Canada, I did not assimilate well, simply because I could not speak the common language. I cried a lot because the elementary school I was enrolled in was... a poor one, and I experienced some minor bullying because I was different. My second grade teacher at this school, was an old lady. She was also, supposedly, the vice principal of the school, so she would teach my class along with another younger teacher. She was very kind and gentle, though I imagine it must have been hard to communicate with me. She was amazed at my mathematical skills for some reason. I must say here, that my math grades were considered poor in Taiwan. (* I shall relate of one of my childhood math stories in a bit.) I did not excel in the subject. Until I came here and realized how easy it was here.

*The story of math and airplanes. 
For one of the math tests (this was fairly early on, probably before elementary school), we were supposed to count up airplanes and add them together (or subtract) and write down the answer. I was told that I purposely wrote down the wrong number (for example, 5) and draw in airplanes in the equation to make my answer a correct one (e.g. if the question 2 airplanes + 2 airplanes, I would draw in an airplane so 5 would be the right answer). And if you must know, I got marked wrong for all those. *shifty eyes* Because "it's not what the questions asked."

Needless to say, Mrs. Loewan (I think that was her name), was an influential figure. She was like a surrogate grandmother in some ways, and made me feel that I am not as dumb in math as I thought I was.

We moved after I graduated grade two, I think. And that's when I met one of the most important people in my life: Mrs. Warkentin. I'm sure she won't mind that I write her name here. When I first arrived at this elementary school, my English was still pretty poor, though I can say and understand simple things. Mrs. Warkentin taught my class with another woman because the latter lady was pregnant. Mrs. Warkentin was also the choir teacher. So naturally, she was very sing-song-y in class, which I personally enjoyed... I still struggled a lot with other subjects that involved English, like, of course Language Arts, Social Studies... One day, Mrs. Warkentin pulled me aside and asked if I would like to join the choir. I will always remember that moment because she strived to help me improve. (If I must compare her to my other teacher... Let me relate to you something that happened... we have this Language Arts journal that we do in class for when we read a book. We write down something we like about the book (I think) and draw a picture to go along with it... The other teacher, Mrs. S let's call her, was always frustrated by what I wrote because well, my English is bad... This one time, when I was sitting down to start writing (something that I was starting to hate), she told me that I didn't have to write anything, but just draw what I wanted to draw...). Anyway, choir was a lot of fun, even though I didn't really know what I was singing about and it gave me the confidence to talk... I was fortunate to have Mrs. Warkentin again when I was in grade four. And this time, she taught the class by herself. It was a great year. There was this one time when I drew something for the Christmas book project that we were working on, she looked at it and told the whole class to stop and look at what I've drawn... I'm just so touched by her, dear readers. Because of how she made me feel about myself. She believes in my potential and helps me toward it. She also took the class to her home for a field trip one day. Her family had set up a BBQ and we all played in her backyard. It was nice. We also had guinea pigs in class, Cutie Pie and Pumpkin. Oh and I won't forget Jake, her doggie, that she introduced us to.

Anyway, I digress a little. She was just the most loving, kind, inspirational teacher I've ever had. And I'm very lucky to have had her during a time when I was still trying to fit in, trying to make sense of the foreign... I can't say enough good things about her. She will always, forever, be the best teacher I've ever had (well, maybe tied with another, that I will write about below).

One day, when I was in high school, and walking home, I thought about her. I thought that maybe I can drop by (since I pass by my elementary school when I walk home) and chat with her. I missed her quite badly that day. So I ventured up to the school, excited to tell her of my accomplishments and how much part she had in my success... Only for the office to tell me that she no longer teaches there... I was crestfallen, regretting that I hadn't gone back and visit her earlier... I cried...

When I was in university, an idea struck me that I can still try to look for her. I searched Facebook for her, just in case she was on the social media. I found a person with her name, so I messaged the person, asking her if she was the one I was looking for (I wasn't sure because the photo was unclear). I got a message back from the woman saying that she had never been a teacher at the elementary school. Then another idea struck me: I can try the school district email. Perhaps she's still teaching. It's worth a try anyway.

You can only imagine my elation when she replied. She told me that she moved on from the elementary school and was helping kids with disabilities. She also told me that just the day before, she was talking to her daughter, wondering if any of her students will ever remember her, only to receive an email from me the next day. We corresponded a little more, updating each other on our lives. Then, busyness took over and I lost contact with her again... I'm not so sad this time though, because she knows just what a significant impact she made on my life. And that's what I want her to know the most...

My grade six and seven (I had him for two years) teacher deserves a mention here. When I was in grade five and graduating to a higher grade, there was rumour that he was the toughest teacher of the entire school. That... was no rumour. He is tough, but he is also an excellent teacher. Mr. Andres, who wears shorts even when it's cold. It is because of him that I started excelling in my academics. I can't say that I've always had a good time in his classes, but he prepped us well for our education and life. And the team games that he would host (he would divide the class up into teams and we would do different activities, ranging in all subjects, earning points to try to win) were difficult, but extremely fun. I didn't hit my breakthrough until I was in grade 7 though. It was because of him that my French is always top of my class... And I'll never forget the time when he complimented on my art in front of another teacher, when I didn't think it was that great. Thanks Mr. Andres, for being a good teacher and preparing us for our future.

I've been fortunate to have a couple of good teachers when I was in high school. My band teacher, Mr. Henderson, is a pretty awesome guy. A brilliant musician and easy-going. Taught us a lot about music and pushing us to be better ones. My grade ten English teacher, Mr. Karvonen. Arguably, the best English teacher I've ever had. He helped ignite the love I have for literature. Entertaining and bright, he cares about the students who care about English. I had the highest mark in his class. My French teacher deserves a mention here too, I guess. I do question her as a person (because she's probably not as nice as she seems), but she was a fairly good French teacher. She was also the teacher that headed the Students' Council. So that makes her a little gossip-y I guess. Anyway, she was encouraging when I went to her for additional French stuff (I was a francophile *shifty eyes*) and she seemed to like me, but like I said, questionable behavior when gossip is involved. I tried really hard in her class because I wanted to excel in French and I guess if she thinks me a "try hard" then so be it. At least I try and work hard. That should be encouraged and not laughed at...

Again, my apologies, for I digress.

I did win outstanding French awards for my grade for two years in French. So I guess, looking past all those disgusting gossip, she was a good teacher in her own right.

Finally, the man that I mentioned earlier, that ties with Mrs. Warkentin as the best teacher I've ever had, is my math teacher, Mr. Mulleny. I'm having a sort of deja-vu here. I feel like I've talked about this before, but I shall continue anyway, because he deserves the praise. Like I said before, math wasn't always my strongest suit. Though I've always done exceptionally well in math in terms of grades... it wasn't really my interest. That changed when I was in grade eleven... I had jumped a grade in math because I took it in summer school, so by the time when grade ten rolled around, I was in grade eleven math. I remember my friends walking me to my class because I was scared. I didn't know anyone since it's a grade higher. I was the first one there and I sat in my seat, the same seat that I would sit for the next two years. I'll get there. Anyway, it was pretty intimidating at first, but I got comfortable in that class because of Mr. Mulleny. He is a teacher that cares. He truly, truly cares. And that's rare, even amongst people! When you have a question, he will help you until you understand it. He explains everything so well and makes you unafraid of asking questions, something which is very, very important in learning. He has a nice sense of humour and you can just tell he's a very good person. When he had his first child (well, not him, his wife), you can tell just how good of a father he will be. He dotes on them (he has two last time I heard... or maybe more, I don't know, lol) and he has their pictures all over his corner of the classroom. He's always been super kind to me, encouraging, and giving me the motivation to be better. I had him again for Math 12, which was a treat. Then again when I retook Math 12 (no, I didn't fail) because I had two spare blocks and my counsellor said I can try to improve upon the mark that I had. When I entered his classroom for the third year in a row, he asked me, "What are you doing here?" I told him that I was retaking Math 12 to improve my grades. And he was like, "But you got an A+."

Lol.

He then proceeded to tell the class, as it started, to try hard because I was here, trying even harder. I didn't mind being there at all. I loved his class. Though I must mention one incident where I got angry at him for the first time ever. And the only time ever... It was when we were learning about quadratics and inverse graphs... I struggled a bit with the inverse subject because there was no clear segue between the topics and it confused me (I like it when there's a flow). And I remember asking him to explain to me better... and then angrily asking him (because I was frustrated with it), why any of this has to do with anything?! I regretted it. But I think he understands. I hope he did anyway.

I wrote to him a couple of years ago, asking him for a reference for the volunteer tutor position at the Toronto Public Library that I wanted to get. He immediately said yes and wrote me a touching note. He was very, very nice with what he wrote in his commendations (so I've been told). He said in his letter to me that he hopes that I can visit him when I get back and that I was kind for volunteering my time to help kids with their schoolwork. He also said that he wishes more of the students he has, were more like me. I can't help but feel so utterly touched. Oh and I forgot to say. It was because of him that I managed to earn some pocket cash by tutoring in high school. He recommended me a lot to his students in the lower grades. My mom said that students kept calling me for help even after I went to university...

Just like it was with Mrs. Warkentin, Mr. Mulleny was a great, influential figure in my life. I will never, ever forget them, for as long as I live. And I am speechless at my great fortune to have had them as my teachers, and for a long period of time as well. I would not have had the academic success I had, if not for them. They pushed me in the right direction and helped me when I needed it the most. They cared as if I am their own child. You can't ask for better teachers...

I haven't encountered any teachers like them when I was in university. Granted, since there are so many students in each course. There is one, however, that I think comes close. His name is Mr. Warley. He was my professor for my ENG444 seminar class on Donne. He reinvigorated my whole love for reading and writing. He taught me how to read and write again.

There were times when he made me extremely uncomfortable in class, such as making me talk, or sitting really close to me (we sat in mobile desks in a circle) to the point that our desks overlapped, but he's brilliant. He also made us go see him individually to talk about our papers. The readings in his class were pretty hard, but it was strangely enjoyable. He encouraged me to really get into my thesis and pushed me in my writing so I can get my idea as persuasive and flawless as possible. And for that, I am eternally grateful.

Anyway, that about ends my post on the most influential teachers in my life. I cannot emphasize just how important these people are in my life. Thank you, teachers.

Koala Thief!

This one has been on my list for a long time...

Just a homage to one of my favourite video games ever.

The Arsonists

Men with twisted minds
Haunt me in my dreams
They are strangers 
With familiar faces
Setting fire to my feet.
The glowing in their eyes 
Reveals a delight
At my inability to leave.
The smoke clouds my eyes,
As I whispered, "Why?"
Forgetting who I'm supposed to be.
They watch as I burn,
A proud accomplishment,
And whisper back,
"Stay here, and be like me."