Composure

I'm wringing my hands so tightly, I'm close to breaking my fingers
So I'm clenching and digging into my thighs, in hopes of holding it all in
I'm trying to suppress my tears, but they erupt like strangled gasps
And I'm shaking with the emotions I refuse to let escape
Was it wrong for me to let myself become this way?
My heart hurts, but I don't know what it means anymore
How can I say anything more when I've already said all that I can
How can we solve the problem, when we only gleam its surface
Every time I'm happy, I'm reminded that I don't deserve to be
Because I'm the criminal in your mind and not an innocent child
Because all I wanted was to be something you cherish,
And my fatal mistake was not letting you know that.

Wound Reopened

You teared off the band-aid
Before the wound has completely healed
And now I'm bleeding tears and crying blood
It's a haemophilic process,
And I don't know how to stop it.

Frightened

There's fatigue and a shadow
Amidst my happiness
And I'm treading cautiously
As my heart threaten to spill words
I no longer know if I can say out loud
Reservations and fears
I don't know how to be myself anymore

Destroyed

I was a destructive child
My curiosity too wild
Chasing butterfly dreams
A need to look underneath
I broke many things
Trying to find my own wings
And as time flew by
I learned of lies
I caged myself within
And became self-destructive.