Blindsided

I'm burning up all of my love
In order to shed you some light,
Yet all you see is darkness.

Published on Nov. 8th, 2011.

Graveyard

You got me tied to a chair
In a dark cold room
And you shine in my beaten-up face
A bright light that swallows up
All the truth that I hold,
My hands are clenched
Trying to grasp onto
Whatever conviction
That is left within me
As you try to strike fear into me,
Trying to rattle my soul,
But you can only get to my body.

My heart is a graveyard,
Where you bury your sadness,
Disappointments and victims
That you murdered
With your unforgiving hands,
And they haunt me like
The shadows that grow long
In daylight,
And amongst them,
There is one I am most afraid of,
My own dead spirit
Walking across the dead landscape.

Published Oct. 31, 2011.

My Heart

My heart is a big, gaping hole
A gateway for dead emotions
To travel through,
My blood veins, the River Styx,
Carrying these resigned feelings
To places to be forgotten.

My heart is Pandora's box, unopened,
Where darkness wants to be set free,
And it impatiently stomps on the chamber floor
Like rude drunkards that refuse to leave the bar
And little hope is in the corner,
Wanting to hide, wanting to disappear.

My heart is the mouth of a black hole,
A vacuum welcoming any type of guests in
They have no regard for the place in which they stay
Vandalizing and carving their names into the walls
And I sit there, trying to scrub it away, but I give up
Because in the end, it's all just a vacuous space.

My heart is an empty ship,
Carrying empty vessels,
Setting sail for destinations unknown,
And if it should sink,
It would make no difference
Because it carries no meaning,
And the newspaper refuses to print
The obituary of just one person
Lost at sea.

My heart is the bottom of a wishing well,
A collection of wishes, selfish or not,
That will never come true,
Because I am sewing it shut.
It should hurt, but I make no noise,
As I push the needle and thread
Through and through.

Published October 23, 2011.

Bracelet

I thread the bead through the string
I'm still smiling from the joke you told me
Careful not to let it fall out on the other end
You showed me the colours of your life
I picked up another bead of a different shade of red
And we spent hours immersed in adventures
And put in through the string
That I'll never forget for the rest of time
It slides down next to the first bead, snuggly,
You told me secrets and stories you've told no one else
And I repeat this pattern methodically,
I keep them safe inside
Until I achieve a strand of beads
With my own secrets and stories that you've learned
Fit for my own wrist, and I excitedly
I've cried and laughed in your presence
Cross the two ends through the final bead
And I am not afraid to show you who I am
Creating a unity, a collection of beads,
A collection of memories
That I wear with joy on my hand
We are pieced together,
Fitted and complete
And I think of you always,
As I look at my new bracelet adoringly.

Empathy

I tread softly around the room,
Turning off all the lights,
And when I got to the last one,
I closed my eyes,
The darkness descends upon me,
Like a candle snuffed out
You suffocate me with your silence
And I fall to the ground
Of this dark room,
One not unlike your heart.

I plead softly to your reason,
Hoping you'd hear my ardor,
But before I could say the last word,
You closed the door,
The light slowly fades away,
Like the ever familiar sunset
I am left crying for your pain
And you fall to the ground
Of this dark world,
One that I am living in too.

Love & Hate

I walk up to you
And unbutton my shirt
Dig my fingers into my skin
And tear it open.
I'm telling you,
That this is how I feel
Whenever you leave me
And you think I've abandoned you,
But do you see,
Do you see, how I bleed,
How my heart
Shakes in its chamber,
In pain and in fear
When you turn your back on me.
I open myself up to you,
Yet you refuse to understand
My love for you,
And so I take my hand
To my heart, ripped it out
And throw it to the ground.
This is how you make me feel.